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Do's and Don'ts of being happy

finitesunrise:

You’re cute and I think you’re interested in me. If you weren’t a walking time bomb I’d totally go for you.

Lately I’m the poster child for living life to be happy, so I can’t really date someone who constantly puts themself down.

And WHAT THE FACK? Is “themself” not a word? Because every single time I type that my computer basically goes “Surprise. You’re retarded.” Google says it’s a word. Kind of. I guess I’ll trust Google. I mean, since it’s basically God these days.

No but really, why can’t yall just be happy? I mean, I’ve been there. That whole not-thinking-you’re-attractive thing. The whole thinking-your-life-could-totally-be-better thing. The constantly-complaining-about-being-lonely-but-not-actually-ever-doing-anything-productive-to-fix-that.

SO I’m basically going to give you a birthday present right now. Oh yeah, surprise, it’s your birthday.

I’m going to write a handbook for you right now about the do’s and don’ts of life. So here you go:

Do talk about what you know and what you love.

Don’t talk about what you don’t like (especially around new friends.) No one likes a negative nancy and finding out your new friend hates something you love is a huge turn off.

Do have fun wherever you go.

Don’t rely on other people to have said fun.

Do live life for yourself and only yourself

Don’t trick yourself into thinking you’re a better person because you want love and will make yourself look like an idiot to get it.

Do flirt with someone you like

Don’t care enough about them to let the fact that they say “no” affect you.

Do surround yourself with other happy people, especially ones you’re not prone to fight with.

Don’t take any fights you DO have with said-friends too seriously. Your life is not a soap opera.

Do stop hanging out with people that cause you unneeded stress, even if they were once your closest friends.

Don’t cling to stale relationships/friendships. It’s only going to make both parties miserable and, many times, the relationship will only go back to normal if you give it space.

Do your own thing regardless of whether others are doing it or not.

Don’t feel the need to constantly surround yourself with people. When someone sees someone else being perfectly content doing their own thing, they will want to do it as well. Hence: trendsetters.

Do care more about what you think than what everyone else thinks.

Don’t suffocate people with your presence. If you invite yourself everywhere people are going to feel forced to be around you. However, if you’re barely ever there they’ll have a much more positive image of you, and they’ll wish you were there.

Do be happy all the time. Everyone ultimately wants to be happy, so if they see someone that always appears to be having fun in life, they’ll want to be around that person more so they can “learn their secret.”

Don’t let shyness prevent you from having fun. Everyone is secretly insecure about what people think about them. You can go up to anyone in your school and strike up a conversation, and I bet you that they will chat right back.

Do let yourself have special moments with people. Romantic or otherwise.

Don’t let some moments be more than a moment. That’s how relationships/friendships turn stale. Everything has an expiration date.

Do accept that things change.

Don’t let things like your boyfriend cheating on you, or your best friend lying to you, or some guy not liking you back bring you down. If your boyfriend is a cheater then he was always going to cheat on you. Your best friend was always going to lie to you. The guy was never going to like you. So why worry yourself with it? It’s how the book is written, and the story clearly didn’t end there since you’re not dead.

Do make jokes out of bad situations.

Don’t make bad situations worse than they are by taking them too seriously. Especially if the situation does not involve you.

Do let yourself be happy when you’re single. Not being tied down can be excellent and once you actually get into a relationship, you may find out that you don’t like it all that much.

Don’t convince yourself that it’s impossible to stop liking someone. It’s very possible to stop. I’ve done it before.

Do go on ACTUAL DATES before rushing into a relationship with someone. If you go on dates before the actual relationship, you’re basically testing the waters to make sure the relationship will indeed work. If you find out it doesn’t, then no harm and no foul. You can still be friends and there’s no awkward “we broke up” conversation with every single person you’re friends with. A lot of people also make the mistake of just asking a person to be their boyfriend/girlfriend and then never physically going out with them, which is the entire point of the relationship.

Don’t date for the title of “In A Relationship”

Do keep yourself level-headed at all times.

Don’t let yourself ever get carried away in a fight.

Do talk about your good qualities. It may sometimes come off as “conceited” but as long as you’re talking about something you like about yourself that you worked to get then there’s absolutely no problem with it. You worked for it, you deserve the praise. Well done.

Don’t complain about your bad qualities. As much as it’s tempting to insult yourself so that others will compliment you, it also makes everyone notice your bad qualities even more. The more you call yourself fat, the more everyone notices your gut.

Do be optimistic

Don’t be cynical. As I stated at the beginning, no one likes a negative nancy. No one at all.

That’s all I can think of for now, but they’re all tried and true methods.